The Fruit of a Cold Day

So, yesterday was cold. The first real cold day we've had so far this year. Consequently, the night before, A Christmas Story was shown on TV. Someone on the bus had the idea that it would be a good idea to tell my 5-year-old son of the good idea it is to stick your tongue to a frozen pole.

I got a call at work at about 9am. The boy needed picking up.

When I showed up, he was crying hysterically. His mouth was full of blood and his tongue looked bruised, except for the tip which looked like a chunk was out of it.

We went to the doctor. The same one we've been to for stiches, stiches removal, ear infection, and now this--all in the past 5 weeks or so. I think they are dedicating a new wing to my son early in the new year.

Of course, there was nothing the doc could do except give him some pain reliever, oh, and a pop sickle. Go figure, the boy wanted something else that was freezing cold in his mouth after that experience, and even ate another 3 after we got home.

By the time I went back to work he seemed fine and was eating pizza now that the bleeding had stopped over an hour later. This morning it looked almost as good as new.

Now, if I could just figure out who put him up to it. I have a feeling it was his friend who got spooked and left him there alone stuck to the pole once he got scared. Just like in the movie.

Bad Tooth Fairy, Bad Fairy

So, Sunday night my 5 year old lost his first tooth. He was so excited for the tooth fairy to come to our house for the first time ever. We put his little, first, baby tooth under The Good Fairy--a statue from the 1917(?) World's Fair that was used in my grandmother's, mother's, my, and now our home for the same purpose of safeguarding the children's teeth until the "real" Good Fairy could spirit them away while leaving them a present in exchange.

When he woke up yesterday morning, he ran to the Good Fairy to find she had forgotten to come. My wife scrambled.

"We just moved the Good Fairy yesterday when we were decorating for Christmas didn't we? Perhaps she had a hard time finding it."

I got in on the action. "Also, it was stormy last night. Perhaps she had a hard time getting everywhere. She's probably just a little late."

Our speculations proved true. The Tooth Fairy did come that day--while my boy was at school and while mom was at the store. I knew she didn't forget.

Chesno Good Business

Golden Corral restaurants have been giving out free meals to Veterans on the Monday after Veteran's Day for some time now. Since 2001, they have given away more than 1,230,960 meals. Last year, I partook in my first one. It was busy, but they also sold a meal to my wife and son they otherwise wouldn't have.

I'm not saying everyone should give veterans things for free just to sell to their family who wouldn't have patronized their store otherwise. I really feel that Golden Corral is doing it because they feel it is a good way they can honour vets. As proof of this too, they have raised $1,393,883 for the Disabled American Veterans Organization. This is the type of organization I prefer to patronize--those who give back and support real American values.

So, visit your local Golden Corral and tell them you support and appreciate their efforts to feed and honour veterans. Just, maybe tonight isn't the night to do it--the line will be long and you'll have to wait at the grill behind me.

Chesno Vote

Today is election and at about 7:50am or so I voted. I listened to the advice of my cousin and voted for people, not parties.

Now, at the polls I did not encounter:

1) Lawyers ensuring everything was going as planned.
2) Bribes of underwear, or Top Ramen to get out and vote.
3) Long lines.
4) Incompetent poll workers.
5) Any voter fraud at all.

It was smooth and easy. I hope the rest of the country finds the same. Although, with some already calling voter fraud in the days BEFORE election day, this may even get uglier than it already has.

(Ahmed) Best Halloween Costume Ever . . . Chesno!

Here it is 2006--7 years after The Phantom Menace hit the screen, and last night I saw a child wearing a costume of the amazingly stupid Jar Jar Binks.

I was blown away. Of course, I don't blame the child. I'm sure his parent found it at the local Goodwill for a quarter and told him he was being Jar Jar this Halloween. Oh, and if he didn't stop that crying, it would be next year too.

The child did have some sense though. He had the plastic "face" mask. You know, the kind that was all the rage in the 1950s through 1980s that didn't pull down over your head, but were held on by a thin piece of white elastic around the back of your head. So, instead of actually wearing the mask on his face, he pulled it up on top of his head like a hat. Smart boy.

I made sure I gave him a fun-sized Abba Zaba for his trouble.

For those of you who need the Jar Jar costume, look here, here, and for the deluxe mask, here. The last one is worth looking at just because you get an idea of what the disembodied head of Jar Jar would look like.